As with most writers, some of the chapters I wrote for The Buddies Rule just don't make the cut. In this case, I decided to go in a different direction with the chapter. To read the Wattpad version of this chapter, click here.
© 2016 Shay Spencer. All rights reserved.
The Buddies Rule
Chapter 10
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One thing that I think about all too often, is my past. Not only my own past, though, but everyone else's. Every action that we've taken, every option that we've turned down, and every person that has come into our lives, have shaped into who we are today. If we were to make one different move, one little mistake back then, we wouldn't be the same people.
It's those kinds of thoughts that float into my mind at times like these. Whenever I don't have Chase by my side, I tend to think the worst. I tend to remind myself of how different my life would be without Chase. It's not only the good that he's brought into my life, but the bad too. Anything that he's added to our relationship, is something that I will never be ready to live without.
That being said, I'm now living in a world without Chase.
Most people could get over a weird loss like this in a fraction of a second and never turn back. But for me, indirectly losing my best friend of almost fifteen years, has taken its toll. The hardest part of this whole thing, and definitely the weirdest part, has been the fact that he's still here. It's not like he's gone forever. Chase has just taken himself out of my life, and I don't know how to get him back.
"Here," Lewis announced as the door to their apartment swung open. Within seconds, I had a bright orange flyer taped to my forehead.
"Here, what?" I scoffed before blindly making my way into the living room. I could hear Lewis close the door as I ripped the flyer off my face. I don't know what I was expecting when Lewis invited me over. I should have known he would bombard me with a neon colored paper and a smiley-faced stick to top it all off.
"Here," Lewis paused, "is an invite to our party. Alan and I are throwing a-"
"Theater bash," I finished for him. "Why the name? Alan isn't in theater, and I didn't think that you were." I could barely read the words that were printed out onto the 'invite'. The ink was splattered all across the orange paper. It looked like some drunk college student had made it.
Oh wait, they probably had.
"Quit frowning," Lewis ordered.
"I can't even read this! The only thing I could see was the stupid theater bash thing. Are you two trying to hit on the drama girls or something?" I rambled before getting a glare back from Lewis. I rolled my eyes and sat down on the couch, for the moment, ignoring my rude friend.
"I'm, in the theater. We're celebrating that, and if you'd stop making disgusting faces at this crap invite, then maybe you'd know that." Lewis snipped before falling onto the couch with me.
"Well maybe if you hadn't made a crap flyer then I wouldn't have so many questions."
"Alan made it." Lewis corrected, the man reaching out to grab the thing before tossing it aside.
"Was he hammered? Or just being Alan?" I teased, feeling a smirk taking form on my face.
"The printer downstairs jammed last night," Lewis sighed. "That's why there's black ink scattered all over the first floor. Alan's still covered in it." I couldn't contain the smile that had taken over my face with Lewis' words.
"That basically answers my questions." I laughed as I pulled one of the pillows over onto my lap. "Where is Alan, anyways?"
"I don't know," Lewis said. "I think he went out for dinner with some girl. I haven't seen much of him all day. I didn't even see him at lunch."
"He was with me at lunch," I brushed off. "He said he would go with me to change my schedule."
"Why?" Lewis scoffed. "You said last That you schedule couldn't be better."
"I don't know," I paused as I played with the pillow on my lap. "Alan helped me realize that I really did like journalism. We got me switched out of the class so now I have a free period to work on my writing."
"Isn't that what you would be doing in journalism?" Lewis laughed.
"No," I snapped back. "It's different. Only Alan understands."
"Sure he does," Lewis shook his head. I could start to feel his eyes boring holes into my head as Lewis thought over something. "Alan was acting really weird after he left your place last night."
"Well, that's definitely not my fault." I huffed before I pulled the pillow closer.
"Then who's fault is it," Lewis asked.
I could feel my chest tighten with Lewis' question. I had barely given myself a chance to think about last night. I wasn't so sure if I was ready to spill about what had gone down. "Chase's," I whispered as my sight fell to my feet.
"Chase?" Lewis repeated. "What did he do?"
"I don't know. They got into a really weird fight when Chase got back home. He practically threw Alan out when we were in the middle of a conversation."
"What was the fight about?" Lewis asked ominously.
"Nothing really," I answered. "Chase got home early and interrupted our conversation. Alan and I were in the middle of working on our journalism article."
"You keep saying that," Lewis pointed out.
"Keep saying what?"
"That you and Alan were in the middle of something." Lewis' eyes narrowed towards me. "What were you two talking about?"
I swallowed hard against the lump in my throat before answering. "At first, we were just talking about journalism. Then, I asked him about him and Zoey. Alan got really defensive. I wasn't sure how to handle him. But then, he was about to tell me something important when Chase walked in."
"What do you think he was going to tell you?"
"Honestly," I paused as I looked back at Lewis. "I thought Alan was going to tell me he was in love with me, and I think Chase knew that when he walked in. That's when the fight started."
Lewis shook his head before he got up from the couch. "Those two really need to give it up," he hissed. Without warning, Lewis stalked off towards the kitchen in anger.
"What do you mean?" I asked. "What do they need to give up?"
"You're lucky." Lewis shook his head once more. "You don't have to pull the two apart half the time." Lewis turned away from me as I trailed into the kitchen.
I could feel my eyebrows furrow together in confusion. "I guess I am lucky," I hinted. "They've seemed perfectly fine every time we've hung out." I watched as Lewis reached up into the cabinet for a bag of chips. If I could get him talking, even for a second, I could figure this whole thing out.
"I asked them to quit," Lewis started up again. "They said this year would be different." Lewis' voice was quiet as he rambled on, the man not meeting my gaze once as I walked into the kitchen.
"What was wrong last year?" I whispered. "What's been going on between them?"
Lewis stopped himself suddenly. His entire body froze for a while second. It was as if he realized what he was saying. With wide eyes, Lewis set the bag down on the counter. Never once did he look at me as he began chewing on the snack he had grabbed.
"Lewis," I said as I slapped his right hand. "Why do they hate each other so much?"
"I really shouldn't say." Lewis shook his head. "It's between Alan and Chase."
"But they've included you for some strange reason," I said, my voice rising along with my anger. "Why can't I know? Why can't I help be a part of the solution?"
"Because it's-" Lewis stopped himself again. "It just doesn't matter."
The air grew thicker as the two of us fell into an awkward silence. Lewis had stopped eating chips, he had resorted to simply stating at the bag on the counter. I, however, was glaring at him. With every ounce of me, I was trying to get him to tell me more. I couldn't just stand here and let our group be torn to shreds by two of the people I loved the most.
"I thought the buddies rule was supposed to fix things." I snapped out of nowhere. "I guess I was wrong." I turned on my heel and walked off to the living room to gather my things.
"Well at least I'm not the one forgetting that we all signed a contract," Lewis reminded smartly. "You had no right to try and get Alan to confess to his feelings for you."
"You're so right, Lewis." I laughed snidely back at him. "I shouldn't have tried to get Alan to tell me about his undying love for me. But you're the one who told me in the first place. I guess you'll just have to live with that." I bit hard into my tongue to keep myself from yelling something worse at him. Lewis' face told me that I had crossed a line. I didn't need him to tell me that.
I stormed out of his apartment, not dating to look back before I slammed the door behind me. The sound echoed down the hallway, and I could hear the other students grown quiet. I couldn't have cared less, though. Lewis had broken my trust by not telling me the one thing that was evidently breaking up our group, and I wouldn't stand for it.
I'd rather die than let those three keep me in the dark any longer.
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